Happy Birthday, Ellen Degeneres!

ABC's Portraits Of The 86th Annual Academy Awards Host Ellen DeGeneres


I often wonder : If I love women a little more than I love men, what does that make me? Gay straight or straight gay? No, this is not a post about me being confused about my sexual orientation, because that would mean apocalypse in a Tamil household. This is about the woman who makes me overwhelmingly happy and inspired. There are a few women who fit the bill, though there is one who tops the list: Ellen Degeneres.

When I googled for an image of her, I can’t choose the best picture. She looks fucking beautiful in every shot. Perhaps it’s the sparkle in her eyes that smiles along with her lips. She is the epitome of someone who smiles from her heart.

Though I started watching her some years back randomly through YouTube video-hopping, not until last year I realized how important she could be to people who are coping with crisis. I’ve watched tonnes of people speak how she made them laugh and overcome the pain they were going through – no joke at all.

Cancer, degenerative disorders, palliative care, depression, anxiety disorders, disability, death, divorce, poverty, pain, coming out – all these needs that one most important tool to cope : willpower to fight. She magically gives that. She gives that extra push that makes you believe there are things to fight for. That there is light at the end of the tunnel which is really really worth it.

Inspiring people is the least you could to anyone yet given at the right time, you’re doing wonders to change their life. When a person is feeling the lowest, reached the bottom of their life, thinking of how to end it – all they look for is a glimmer of light. Ellen was the light that helped me through my tunnel of darkness. When I was looking for a distraction, she was there. When I wanted to have something to look forward to in a day full of chaotic mind, she was there. When I was ready to cry for myself, she showed me it helps much more to cry for others. And when you are kind to one another, your pain disappears. If I get to meet her in person, I’d be one of those people who sob and sob and sob. And she’d be there hugging me like she knows me forever.

I believe in thoughts and mind power. I believe if I sync my whole thought process for a moment and channel it to the universe, the force reflects back to the one I am intending to.

So Ellen, on your birthday: I’m channeling all my energy to wish you a blessed birthday with prolonged healthy life and keep doing what makes you you. Keep being happy, keep being inspiring, keep getting into bucket lists and keep being Ellen. You could be sitting on  the same couch everyday but you are present whenever people need that glimmer of light. People see happiness in the monologues, the missed scripts, the spontaneous outbursts of laughs, sincere tears in your eyes, the awards you win, the winning speech that you make people proud to be your fan, the money you help others with, the moments you speak about Portia with sparkles in your eyes, the times you mention your back is getting better, your dance and most importantly You. Happy joyous Birthday! 


Happy Birthday You.


For the late nights.
For the super duper early mornings.
For the ridiculous crap texts.
For the random hearts.
For the persistence and perseverance.
For supporting and always being there.
For annoying the crap out of me.
For giving me spontaneous smiles.
For the inspiration to write.
For the rhythm to dance.
For the eyes that never get tired of watching.
For the magic that never faded.

Happy Birthday J.

You are the best randomity that striked me so

Happy Birthday, Love.

Friends are those your heart speaks to - when your voice fails you.

Friends are those your heart speaks to – when your voice fails you.

There are some people you lived with so long that you know each others’ routine like the back of your hand. They are the same people you can’t stand their bad habits yet love them to bits. The person may not be sitting before you right now, but you could hear their voices and predict their reactions. Many would say you’re lucky if you have a spouse who fits these descriptions. But I’d say you’re luckier when it is indeed a friend, instead. I lived with her for 6 years. We went through so much together, that I doubt we’ll share this similar bond with anyone else in our lives. Our usual inside joke: that she’s the longest relationship I’ve ever had.

Leaving AIMST, I miss her the most. Our random movie outings, childish ramblings about life, sharing of essentials, cursing and bitching away, multiple inside jokes, dirty references, drooling over hot hunks of Bollywood, rolling eyes moments and annoying each other without ends. I believe when you have friendships of years old, you can pat your shoulders and give yourself a virtual hug. Because it’s not easy to nurture a friendship. It’s not easy to find a great friend who complements your characteristics, first of all. Out of millions of people you come across in life, there are only very few you could actually relate to. Among those few, you gotta tolerate their minuses and cherish their pluses; and vice-versa. 

My friendship with her is as such. We’re very ordinary people who want the best for each other. There are some people who could make you feel blessed because of the love they give you. And you want to repay them with even more love. Thiviya, I wish you many many happy returns of the day and I shall give you a hug in real, soon. You’re beyond special, to me. 

Happy Birthday, Love.

ImageBirthdays are very special. Especially your own one. I believe that celebrations keep our life more meaningful. Celebrating birthdays, anniversaries, friendships – heck life itself is worth celebrating. You celebrate something that you think pleasing enough. Things that you are grateful for, things that make you feel good, things that keep giving you smiles, things that keep the butterflies alive.

When I was a teenager, I used to annoy the hell out of my friends by making a one month countdown to my birthday. That will be the main reason I look forward for the reopening of school – when most kids  were sad that their morning sleeps were gone.I would make puppy face to my friends expecting them to get excited as I was. God knows how annoyed they were. Imagine the first thing you get to hear in the morning when you’re still sleepwalking like a zombie – “25 more days!”

I didn’t know back then the significance of my own birthday. I was always my favorite person in this world. I love myself like nothing else. I made it a point to stand in front of the mirror and smile to myself before going to bed every night. I find this life God has given me is a gift worth to be cherished.

I never liked having huge parties for myself, though I love throwing parties for other occasions. My ideal way of celebrating this day would be staying home with my parents who don’t give a fuss about parties. Maybe one day I would try being completely alone on my birthday. What more the best way to celebrate if not with myself? With an authentic pizza, a glass of Hoe Gaarden, a Maniratnam movie, plenty of A.R.Rahman songs, a good book by Susan E. Phillips, a long shower and followed by a good  peaceful sleep.

When that happens, I’d know that I’m dead and entered heaven.