Goodbye

Some people are great as entities. They would appear perfect on paper. Matured, friendly, serious, productive, conscious, spiritual and inspiring. They could go on talking for hours about meaningful topics like politics, leadership, spirituality, society and moral. They agree upon the similar music. They worship the similar movie maker. They equally love food. They both adore writing. They believe in conviction. They follow a particular moral of conduct. They are ambitious. They realize their potential in life. They realize there’s a beautiful friendship beneath the relationship they share.

Yet, the day comes when they realize they are not as great as a couple. One is a passionate lover, another is a rational realist. One seeks unconditional love; another seeks where it was lost. One is emotional; another is practical. Oh, you balance each other out, they say. But no, we ruin each other, we’d say.

So, off we go, each on our own path; to conquer our own mountains; to defeat our own demons. One day, maybe our paths shall cross again. Maybe we could shake hands as companions, again.

But till then, it is goodbye.

Thank you. For the three meaningful years. For the good goodbye. For being the braver one to let go. You are definitely, a warrior.

Happy Birthday, Love.

ImageBirthdays are very special. Especially your own one. I believe that celebrations keep our life more meaningful. Celebrating birthdays, anniversaries, friendships – heck life itself is worth celebrating. You celebrate something that you think pleasing enough. Things that you are grateful for, things that make you feel good, things that keep giving you smiles, things that keep the butterflies alive.

When I was a teenager, I used to annoy the hell out of my friends by making a one month countdown to my birthday. That will be the main reason I look forward for the reopening of school – when most kids  were sad that their morning sleeps were gone.I would make puppy face to my friends expecting them to get excited as I was. God knows how annoyed they were. Imagine the first thing you get to hear in the morning when you’re still sleepwalking like a zombie – “25 more days!”

I didn’t know back then the significance of my own birthday. I was always my favorite person in this world. I love myself like nothing else. I made it a point to stand in front of the mirror and smile to myself before going to bed every night. I find this life God has given me is a gift worth to be cherished.

I never liked having huge parties for myself, though I love throwing parties for other occasions. My ideal way of celebrating this day would be staying home with my parents who don’t give a fuss about parties. Maybe one day I would try being completely alone on my birthday. What more the best way to celebrate if not with myself? With an authentic pizza, a glass of Hoe Gaarden, a Maniratnam movie, plenty of A.R.Rahman songs, a good book by Susan E. Phillips, a long shower and followed by a good  peaceful sleep.

When that happens, I’d know that I’m dead and entered heaven.

Milestones.

I always believe that life isn’t about reaching destination but the journey throughout. Most of us are fortunate enough because we’re granted a long journey, unlike those kids who were born with AIDS or cancer. They have no choice but to look forward death without understanding the reason behind their illness. There couldn’t be anything deathly than having so many unanswered questions in life. I have a friend whose brother-in-law suffered in leukemia for more than a year before greeting Yama. He needn’t have to go through all the chemos and radios. He needn’t have to undergo surgeries which took away all his strength. He needn’t have to leave behind a woman after being married to her for only a few years. He had such a good eye for photography. He had his whole life laid before him, until one day the big man up there decided to plant a time bomb in his life.

I have tonnes of unanswered questions popping up daily.  His departure from this world added more questions to the list. I want to understand life. I want to know my capacities. I want to reach my extreme borders with definite dreams in my eyes. I am very fortunate for been given the light of my destiny quite on time. I never had dentist in my ambition list. Lawyer, scientist, astronaut, interior designer, medical doctor etc. Everything in the world but a dentist or a teacher (thanks to my mother). My mother possesses that intense dedication towards her career till I knew if I can’t reach up to her level, I will make a terrible teacher. But she taught me that you have to be truly dedicated to what you’re being paid for. That is your duty and you should never seek excuses not to complete your duty.

Now after four years, I am pretty sure this is my destiny. I love teeth; I love giving people beautiful smiles; I love giving importance to aesthetics. Will I leave this for another passion of mine, dance? No. I want to be a dancing dentist. Both feed happiness to me. God is fair to me because He made me realize my dreams. Now that I have dreams, I could work towards them. I  would know whenever I reach a milestone of my dream. My first milestone would be going through supplementary papers in Year 1. The following was when my first patient walked into the clinic in Year 3. My next milestone would be when I issue my first denture. I don’t mind getting battered by the books and the teachers, as long as I learn it the right way.

Talking about dreams, how many of us are actually courageous enough to pursue them? How many us are willing to leave our comfort zone and venture into something unknown? Something your own parents didn’t have enough confidence of.

There was nobody to support you through the dream initially yet you chose to work towards it. Only because you alone have believe in yourself. Then one day people start to turn their heads and be amazed. The qualities that you were laughed upon by your immature teenage friends became your pillars of strength. Once upon a time you were the editor of your own scrapbook. Today you have written a whole novel – The Rainforest Unicorns.

Amongst so many of current youths who chase after either money or chicks, you chose to chase after your dream instead. I wish there are many of us with this kind of attitude towards life. Many take this life given to them for granted. Many don’t realize that by evolving themselves, they actually evolve their surroundings. Life is not a debit machine where you keep withdrawing to spend. It is also not a fixed deposit account where you keep storing your profits. When the world is moving greedily behind money, you gained my attention through your selfless acts of helping people. By knowing your acceptance of life as it is; people as they are, you gained my respect.

Giving has so much of pleasure. I always enjoyed giving people what I would like to be given. I enjoy shopping for gifts rather than for myself. I like celebrating important events of others. Have you ever organized a birthday party for a close friend who had misunderstandings with you and later enjoy observing your friends running around with the cake, party bloopers etc., while you collecting the left over boxes around the place? It’s an amazing feeling to see happiness on others’ faces. Happiness is contagious. The more people around you are happy, the happier you get though you’re in a deep shit.  I wish people will give more in order to receive. When you choose to abandon your own dentures and offer to assist an DSA-less operator, one day (within the same week, normally) you get it paid well. Karma isn’t a bitch (though my foul mouth does abuse so) ,it is just a way of reality proving Newton’s third law is utmost right.

Rainforest Unicorns, is publishing in about 48 hours. I never doubted Ram’s talent. He’s a born writer. Seeing everything in a solid form, that too in such a young age, I can’t help but let myself swell in pride. The same way I swelled when my brothers received the scroll. The same way I swelled when my sister received the Best Student Award. The same way I swelled when my mom’s school got awarded as one of the best schools in the state.

” Direction is more important that speed. We are so busy looking at our speedometers that we forget the milestone ” – Unknown

When I love you is an understatement

What I have with you is beyond beautiful. It gives me contentment. It allows me to sleep peacefully at night. It gives me this assurance that none other gives. I can boldly say I know you like the back of my hand. I know you’ll hold me throughout. I know I can dedicate that song for you. I’m convinced that you’re here to stay. That you have been putting in enough effort and not hesitant to put in more. That you are willing to spend energy for my happiness. That you will defend me to this world.

You allow me to build dreams – of my own and ours. You spur my creativity. You motivate me to grow my passions. You never stand in my way of independence – unless to hug me. You walk me through my fears – having my hand in yours. You guide me through my mistakes. You allow me to realize and come to terms with them. You never got intimidated by my personality. You managed your insecurities brilliantly while helping me through mine. You listen when I complain continuously. You ask for my opinions because you respect my views. You understand me – like how I understand myself.

You not only treat me like a princess, in fact you make me feel like one.